IMAGE IS LOADING, PLS BE PATIENT.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Of fences and walls
Probably handling human relationships is something I will never get it right my entire life...
From a young age, I have struggled with manging relationships. It doesn't come easily to me like other people who naturally have a gift interacting with people.
I think too hard, too much at times. I care too much about the way people look at me from the way I speak, behave and act. I care too much about how my words and actions will impact them.
That's why every word, every action I do..is after much consideration.
I am too sensitive to other people's feelings.
My mum says I will go crazy very soon with my brain thinking about all these seemingly trivial things.
To prevent myself from hurt, I have also started building fences and walls around myself and other people.
There is a barrier that I create around me, such that I don't naturally get close to people and it's hard for people to share my thoughts, my feelings.
But at the same time I desperately want to connect to people the same way as people do. I want to have great friends around me.
But I guess it's hard, when there's a wall that I've already started constructing around me since a long time ago.
Maybe one day I will start to tear down this wall around me..
I guess that's when I have mastered the art of dealing with human relationships.
Right now I am still learning and trying hard at building doors and windows on my walls.
Add colours to your life!!
7:14 PM
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Milo Mochaaaaa!
Haven't been to the supermarket in a long time. So I didn't know now Milo comes in 3-in-1 Milo Mocha flavour until my mom bought home one pack of this:
The Star: Milo Fuze Mocha
I've actually experimented making my own version of Miloc Mocha with coffee and a few tablespoons of Milo powder. But it usually tastes different everytime, depending on how much milo I feel like putting each time. Ha!
But this Milo Mocha doesn't have too strong a coffee taste... It just taste alot less sweet than the usual instant Milo because of the balance by the bitterness of the coffee added to it.
I will still very much prefer adding Milo to my own cuppa coffee. It helps to keep me awake too!
Add colours to your life!!
4:52 PM
Saturday, March 1, 2008
Wisdom Teeth
Extracted both my wisdom teeth yesterday. Right side, top and bottom.
Did it at Alexandra Hospital Dental Clinic.
I was supposed to do all 4 at a time under general anasthesia (GA), but having the ultra-worried mum, she made me do 2 at a time under local anasthesia (LA).
Ok I was just scared about enduring the injections to the gum for LA so I opted for GA at first. Heard about all the horror stories about injecting numerous times directly to the gum and I was cringing in fear each time I heard it, as though feeling the pain already. Thot that the worst part of the surgery was the injections. But boy! I was very wrong!
The injections to the gums were okie and it was nothing like I've heard. Just fine, almost painless needles inserted to almost every corner of my right gum. She refused to tell me how many injections I needed, but silently counting.. it seems like 5-10 injections!!
I am quite lucky to have a skilfull surgeon and at first I was still having doubts about doing in a hospital, and regretted not being able to go for a private surgeon.
And the read ordeal really began after my right side of the mouth turned numb and when I was covered under the green surgery 'cloth'...
Being fully conscious throughout the surgery cooks up lotsa (unneccesary) fear in me. Maybe opting for GA would be much better, cos ignorance is indeed bliss during the surgery. Whatever I could not see but can hear conjures up all the imagined visual images in my brain.
First it was the drilling sound to split my horizontally growing wisdom tooth into half for easy extraction. The scary drilling noise terrifies me so much, especially when I thought of whether she'll lose control and continue drilling into my gums if she did not stop the drill in time. I really regretted not having a faith at that point in time. Because my hands were clasped so tightly but I could not utter any prayers to any higher-being which I firmly do not believe in existence. So I could only keep assuring myself to be brave and strong and have absolute confidence in the dentist and changed to crossing my fingers instead.
It helps. :)
After the drilling, the yanking of the teeth took place. It took 2 more nurses to pin me down while the dentist extracted my 2 bottom molar fragments and the top wisdom tooth. Somehow I wasn't feeling so scared at this point, at least the worse or so I felt, was long over.
Luckily the few minutes did not drag forever and it was really a simple operation.
Now my right side of my jaw jus felt empty, for the 2 wisdom teeth that I've been keeping in my mouth were gone. But there will be no more digging of food morsels after every meals, especially nuts.. all kinds of nut fragments tend to get stuck in the gap.
But now I am already dreading having to relive the ordeal all over again.. definitely a few months later!!
Add colours to your life!!
8:50 PM
